When Logic Isn’t Available

In the three years Roger and Shelley had been dating, Roger had won precisely zero of the arguments. He figured it was just a “battle of the sexes” type deal, where he couldn’t have won no matter what, but in fact it was

quite simple really. Generally speaking men tend to focus more on facts while women tend to resort to more emotional appeals. They were just another average couple. Roger never “won” a single argument because Shelley would yell, scream and shut him down every step of the way.

An astute observation. With this knowledge at hand Roger decided to head over to the local bookstore and grabbed a book on logic. He was about to, pardon the cliche, DESTROY her with FACTS and LOGIC. Or so he thought.

All of the books on logic appeared to be sold out, so Roger grabbed the next best thing: a self help book called "How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You". This will do just fine, he thought to himself.

After all, it was only a prop. He didn’t have to actually read the book. But he did, in one intense 5 hour Oreo-fueled readathon. And he learned a lot about his cat that day.

But 1 sad fact from his cat's diary stuck out: she'd never had a birthday party. Bryce spent months inviting strays & learning how to make angel food cake. The surprise made Princess jump, fall into a tray of catnip shots, & scramble crying out the door. A video of it went viral.