The Secret of the Ooze

There wasn’t a molecule in my body that wanted to know what biofilm slime tasted like, so imagine my enthusiasm at actually learning it firsthand.

Let me back up. I have this friend, Rebecca Boyd, who has strange dietary opinions. She refuses to eat anything multicellular. Even fruit that has naturally fallen from a tree might feel pain, she claims. "I can't eat a tree's babies!" she says. Her solution: biofilm slime pizza.

She claims it tastes like chicken. “How can biofilm taste like chicken?” “Well you wouldn’t know until you tried it.” I stare at this gooey mess in front of me. I raise it to my mouth, close my eyes… and at the next moment I taste chicken. Strange. Everything tastes like chicken.