The Orphan's Stomach

The door creaked open, revealing a long forgotten room. Hesitance filled the orphan’s stomachs but that feeling soon wore off. Hand in hand, they inched forward.

Yes, you read that right. The orphan had several stomachs, and 3/4 of them were full of dread. The fourth one was full of Froot Loops and Count Chocula. Never give an orphan unlimited access to sugar cereal: they’ll eat the entire box in one sitting. A careful reader might ask:

"Do the multiple stomachs imply that the orphans are, in fact, cows?" The answer to this question is, "Yes. Unequivocally, yes." It was on this cow-orphan farm that Jesse, the farmer's innocent but ravishing daughter, made a discovery. She raced barefoot through the field, crying

"The cows!" Jessie sobbed into her hands in despair. "The cows are orphans because of me! I didn't mean to eat their mother, I just really wanted a Big Mac!"

Officer Dan, still in his cereal-stained uniform, patted her back. “It’s okay, kid. We’ve all been there. Last week I took out a family of chickens over a bucket of extra crispy.” Behind him, the orphaned calves stared through the glass, plotting with a quiet, milky vengeance.