Candy Teeth on the second stage

31 March 2022

  • They just announced the lineup for this summer’s Clangfest and it’s straight fire! The Seagull Sisters are headlining. Easy Peasy Squeeze Cheese is performing. Sneak Squeak has gotten back together for one night only. DJ Doofus is spinning in the Stress Tent. We need tickets!
    3/26/22 11:44pm
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  • Hey, hey chillax bro! We’ll get some alright. Let’s just say I know a few people in there. Best of all they’ll give us the tickets for free. Oh and I didn’t forget to bring the good stuff. Wink wink. A giant gate stands in front of us. “Clangfest”. Time to get this party started.
    3/27/22 12:51am
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  • “Alright, bet” I say, and hold steady as I can. A strobe light pulses somewhere deeper in and electric bass pounds in sync with it - I know the chemicals’ve slid in past the blood-brain barrier by now. Something else: lank, gray man moving choppy, like claymation. Is it real?
    3/31/22 7:07am
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  • Oh yes, it is real. Slenderman is carefully approaching me, carrying a stack of papers with unintelligible scribbles on them. Stranger yet, it looks like they're addressed to me.
    3/31/22 7:42am
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  • Slenderman puts the papers in my hands & their scribbles slowly coalesce into words. "Went to school with no pants on," reads one line. "Tried to kiss Anita Flores, but a green owl flew between our lips," reads another. "Candy teeth," reads the next. "Are these my dreams?" I ask.
    3/31/22 8:37am
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  • Devoid of any emotion, he gave a blank stare. “Well I suppose they are, they seem a little too familiar.” No response from Slendy. He then put down the eighth piece of paper. I immediately grabbed all eight and ran off into the horizon. “Seeya sucker!” I yelled, not looking back.
    3/31/22 1:59pm
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The End