Rat-A-Loony

Just because anyone can cook, doesn’t mean they should.

16 April 2022

  • There once was a mouse, and he lived in a house, with his daughter, and mother, and spouse. Along came a cat with a belly so fat, and under his hat there lived a small bat. And the villainous duo knocked down the whole house.
    2/26/22 5:43am
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  • Now the villainous cat and that dastardly bat were ever so pleased with the house they helped ‘splat’. But the poor mice of four were really quite poor so now they were consigned to sleep on the floor. And the rain it did come and that was no fun for the mice and most everyone.
    3/1/22 3:09pm
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  • The lightning flashed. The thunder crashed. The old Ming vase was bumped & smashed. The pieces dashed across the floor. It'd hold cut flowers nevermore. Among the shards the mice did creep, the storm too loud to let them sleep, each so hungry they started to weep.
    3/14/22 6:05pm
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  • One mouse made his way into the kitchen, finding food became his mission. Among spices and herbs, he settled on making hor d'oeuvres, for his mice friends could not eat conserves. So the mouse got to work, with a bit of a smirk, knowing this meal would surely give him a perk.
    3/24/22 9:40am
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  • Who else but Ratatouille, actually Remy, with a figure so cartoony, conjure up a meal so lively, with the help of mice so many? And here we thought that mice and food can never be together, no, for such a nasty threat to health would make a health inspector faint, and rightly so…
    3/28/22 1:24pm
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  • The head psychologist paused playback of the video. “The patient is of course referring to an animated movie in which a rat becomes a chef. This explains the compulsive cooking and intentional fostering of rodents in the subject’s kitchen. The next part is fascinating…”
    3/30/22 4:17pm
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  • The video continued. The patient added strange ingredients to their food - some of them didn't even fit as edibles! They seemed to enjoy the taste though when the food was ready. "So -" the psychologist continued, "such a strange behavior must bring us to the conclusion that..."
    4/10/22 3:00am
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  • The psychologist paused. The subjects appeared uncomfortable. “Everyone ok?” He asked cautiously. The subjects looked at each other as they turned blue, then orange and finally a nice limey green. The experiment was a success. They would go on to live their lives as giant toads.
    4/16/22 3:40pm
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The End