Light poured through the canopy of the verdant glen, dancing upon the heads of Teri, Tabby, and Tim—the elder squirrels of the Acorn Clan. They came together on this crisp spring morning in order to discuss an issue of solemn significance.
Sometimes, some crimes go slippin’ through the cracks, but these three Sciuridae are too honorable for that. The Acorn Clan elders gathered the tribe and began their inquiry with the question on everyone’s mind.
"How in the acornin backyard did you ever think you could steal the Acorn Clan's grand reserve harvest by stashing them in your cheeks! We can *LITERALLY* see them, you foolish little squirrel. What do you have to say for yourself?" the eldest elder inquired in exasperation.
“Okay everybody let’s wrap for lunch!” The program director shouted. Ted removed his stuffy foam head, panting and dripping with sweat. He was beginning to regret having pressured the group to hold this year’s Woodland Creatures Furry LARP in Honolulu.
As soon as they walked inside the museum, their faces turned grim. But the Griswolds had already spent $150 for parking, so there was certainly no turning back now.
A special exhibit on the life and times of Tom Selleck and his horse "Aloha" was not what Mrs. Griswold had in mind when she suggested a day out at the museum. She turned toward her family, the corner of her mouth slightly turned up, "Fourth floor. I've got a plan."
She was one to follow the rules, so to see her with a mischievous look in her eye had everyone excited. They scrambled to the elevator and got in. As it slowly ascended their anticipation grew. They kept looking at her for any indication of what was to come.
2...3...4...the elevator ascended to the penthouse, when suddenly everything went dark and their progress came to a screeching halt. Now, the only illumination came from the red "help" indicator above the elevator's emergency phone.
It was nearly pitch black and silent - until a 'thud' came from the ceiling. It was quickly apparent that there was now someone walking around, above our heads.
"Is that two or four legs?!" I attempt to wisper with a trumbling voice. Four, definitely four, hopefully it's just a family of racoons and our plan is still ON. I convince myself. Well...we'll find out soon enough.
As I continue to walk down the street, I trip over a garbage can and out comes a family of raccoons, oh wait those are just possums with covid-19 mask on! Get me back to the city...
I climbed into my Sebring, rolled up the windows and flipped the switch to..."Crap", I said. The possums had climbed into the back seat and had eaten holes in the cloth convertible top. Now I would have to drive back to the city with the wind & rain coming down on my interior.